Tweety's Revenge

Tweety sits on the perch inside his cage and looks sweet enough to be the poster child for Mary Poppins. I ask you, who wouldn't love this little yellow canary who's chipper as a chickadee?

As you may recall, Tweety spent most of his time avoiding Sylvester, the cat. Now, Sylvester had a real passion. He wanted chicken fricassee. But, while his mouth watered for that tasty dish, he was willing to settle for canary stew.

It appears that cat finally caught his bird. But it cost him. Dearly.

Tweety and Sylvester moved from their previous location to the northern island of Ruegen, Germany. There are 25 nations in the European Union, but this cat ate his bird in Germany. He stalked it, crouching low to the ground as cats do when practising stealthy maneuvers, then pounced with precision. Nailing his bird. Feathers flew. A couple of invisible germs flew, too. The ones known as H5N1.

Yep. You've guessed it. The cat caught his bird. He also caught the Avian flu.

Seems our German cat is not the only one to die from this flu. Some tigers and leopards in a Thailand zoo ate a hearty meal of chicken. Soon, they went belly-up, their bodies stiff with rigor mortis. Three housecats in Bangkok suffered the same fate. It's evident that the H5N1 virus is hopping right along the food chain.

THE OFFICIALS IN CHARGE OF THESE AFFAIRS TELL US THERE IS NOTHING TO WORRY ABOUT.

There's a simple solution to this bird flu situation and we should start using it immediately before this epidemic gets all out of proportion.

Catch the birds on the wing. Package them nicely. And ship them out to the terrorists. You know those terrorists have gotta be starving. I mean, they're always on the run. With all that exercise they must work up quite an appetite. If this military strategy is executed flawlessly, those terrorists will never suspect a thing. Certainly not foul play.

And Walla! The Bush administration can take kudos for netting two squabs with the same pigeon drop. It would probably cut down on the need for increasing port security, too.

Now wouldn't that just be the cat's meow?
Tweety's Revenge © 2006 Chaeli Lee Sullivan